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Be Brand New

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I'm done with 'Istiqamah article' just now.
But, for some reason- I'm not feeling satisfied with something.
Maybe with this sentence:

To be honest, I'm trying very hard to keep my privacy to myself and (surely) never intended to make it public. But, gradually my posting at social media starting to leak my identity, my way of thinking (that somehow- it's too typical or (seldomly) it was too liberal to be accepted by others) and I'm writing my problems as well. That's one of the terms that I have difficulty to follow. And now- I'm breaking the rule again.

I'm asking myself:
"Is it wrong to write something good? Even no one agrees"?
My subconscious mind replied with this:
"Actually the underlying cause is not the acceptance of others.
But- It is You- Who afraid to be judged by them".
John C. Maxwell had said in his book on How Successful People Growth: " .... feed your faith and starve your fear".
Which means you have to strive on what you believe in (In my case- I totally believe that I can perform better if I voice out my opinion to the public) and face your fear ( by accepting the fact that I'm afraid to be judged).
So that, you can increase your effectiveness by two or three fold.

Then, I'm trying to comfort myself by searching for evidence and urgency to change quickly:
These what I got:

B-B-N?

1. People keep changing-
But they do not expose it unless they find the situation is safe & less- critique from others.
For example: I'm stalking my friend's IG and really flabbergasted on how drastically he had transformed himself  (From his hairstyle, caption at the shared images and his attitude to reply all of those annoying comments). I know him personally as someone whom pious and AJK Surau during the secondary school. But, today- The perspective doesn't match the reality.
He started to expose the transformation to his new clique.
(Where he is totally unknown right there & no one knows his history & good profile, thus he dare to show the other side of himself)

2.   People want to stay at the comfort zone and maintained the good label-
This second point is really correlate with the first and circulating on the perspective of how we see ourselves on another person's shoes. We want them to keep cherish and stay with us by always calibrate our point of view side to side. So, no argumentation and no misunderstanding from both parties that may risk the bond build between we- and them.

3. Low self esteem- 
Actually self compassion is different from self esteem.Self- esteem often falters when we are less- than- perfect, and dives into depression and anxiety. Self- compassion recognizes that humans are flawed and our 'failures' are part of humanity. So, when they kick start their action to open up the mask- They find tribulation which slows the momentum gradually and end up with not to change mind.

4. Don't know how to react accordingly with their labelled value-
Just now, you post something that considered as rare and waiting for the comments from the acquaintances and friends. First, you can handle it but after four or five persons started to give their opinion back to back- You find it difficult to maintain the good vibe and avoid the same posting on the future.
But, this trick is useful if it is used gradually to give the sense of comfort and in- control feeling to you.

5. You name it....

Actually... all of these aforementioned points are intertwined with one another and hardly changed if it came within us.
So, if we want to be better. We have to know on how to do things right by identify the roots of problems and do the appropriate action

I decided to be brand new and go further.
How about you?

Fly-Non-Stop





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1 comments:

Anonymous said...

"I decided to be brand new and go further"